Cleopatra and Chocolate Cake.

All right, so it's been over a month since I've posted. Pretty much, my life has been on hiatus. I am enjoying the lazy summer and instead of constant bad luck, I seem to be at a null. The most exciting thing to have happened is counting down the days until our family trip to the Florida Keys. YAYYY!!!

But then....

I started a new book this week, and as I turned a page in this book, a fortune cookie fortune paper fell out.

"Soon you will be sitting on top of the world."

I was giddy, excited that a happy new fun chapter might be starting in my life. That was a Sunday night.

It is now Wednesday. It's been a pretty good week.

I've gotten to spend a lot of time with my li'l sis, just me and her, which has been really great. I also found out that my dad is a brilliant cook. Reading the new book has also put me in this really good mood this week...it's called "The Memoirs of Cleopatra", so (duh) it's all about the beloved Queen of the Nile. Just reading about how strong and amazing she is kind of rubs off on me and makes me walk around trying to be that way as well.

So, on Monday at work at the hotel, in walk these two young guys in suits. They're here for a week on business. I don't pay a lot of attention to them at first, being that I'm on this dating fast for a while and have no desire to be in any way involved with any man...however, one of them keeps dropping these comments to his co-worker about rockclimbing, working out, macho stuff, blah blah blah. This makes me roll my eyes literally, of course.

But, then, a little while later, one of the guys comes back downstairs to make his way out to the gym -- the guy that had been bragging about rockclimbing and all that jazz. I actually observe him this time, however, and he's pretty cute. Tan, dark hair, and these gorgeous big gray eyes. He asks me if the gym is across the street and, distracted by observing his looks, I say, "Oh yeah. And there's a tanning bed, too." Insert foot in mouth #1. He just looks at me.

"Uhh, tanning bed?"

The phone rings, saved by the bell. I'm red in the face beyond belief and can't believe that statement had really just come out of my mouth.

The next day I see him again, and he makes a comment about the tanning bed, so the hopes I'd had before about how maybe he hadn't heard me when I'd said it flew out the window. I then said, "Hey, your partner just walked out the door to go get food."

Wow. Insert foot in mouth #2.

"Partner?" He asks. "First the tanning bed, and now my partner? You must think I'm gay."

"Uh, I put my foot in my mouth a lot," I joke.
"Oh yeah?" he says, grinning. "How does it taste?

Then he asks me out for dinner with him, so I feel relieved that he actually has a sense of humor.

Unfortunately, I'm working so I can't go to dinner with him that night.

So, we talk for quite a while that night, and I learn that he is not only getting more and more extremely good looking as he keeps talking, but he's also intelligent, he's got a masters degree at only 23, and we have some unusual, but refreshing things in common. He also likes to keep eye contact 100% of the time as he's talking to you, so I tried my best to do the same. It was hard. I almost passed out.

I hated to leave last night. I wanted to keep talking and getting to know him.

But today was the kicker. He came in and talked for a bit and then, when he came back from dinner, he had a bag in his hand.

"I brought you chocolate cake," he grins. I just stared at him. I wasn't sure if he was being serious. Did he realize just how much I am obsessed with chocolate?

"Are you trying to win my heart?" I ask him.
"Hmmm, who knows," is his coy reply.

This is the best chocolate cake I've ever had in my life and ol' Gray Eyes is definitely winning points with currently Man-Hating Tabitha.

Stay tuned.....

Case of the Bad Luck Blues

So, I've had a surge of empowerment tonight, and I'm not sure exactly why, but thank God for it.
I've had the worst luck these last two weeks. Allow me to share:

1.) The BAD break-up.
2.) I was walking across school campus minding my own business, when I was suddenly attacked by a random goose on the campus lawn. It chased me 100 yards as I was squealing before the maintenance man came out and saved me.
3.) I was simply picking up a champagne bottle out of my car to take in the house and the cork randomly exploded out of the bottle and popped me in the face.
4.) I was left stranded downtown in Athens this weekend by my "friends".
5.) I was pursued and asked out by a really great guy. He said he'd call Monday night to make plans for the weekend. It is now Thursday night, and I have not heard from him.

What the hell? I mean, at the risk of sounding arrogant, I'm a good catch. I don't want a relationship, but some fun dates/attention from a good looking member of the opposite sex would be appreciated.

Looks like the only man a woman can count on these days is Captain Morgan. Ah, God bless him.

How do you fall in love with your life?

I want to be in love with my life again.

How do I accomplish this?

How do I fall in love with my life again? What is it that makes me actually be in love with my life? Is it the adoration from a man? Is it doing well in school? Is it excelling at work? Is it making and saving money? Is it being with friends? Is it meeting new people and networking? Is it spending lots of time with my family? Is it taking up new hobbies, or trying new things? Facing my fears? Being completely independent and not relying on my parents to take care of me anymore? Obsessively writing more, as I used to do?

What is it that makes me fall in love with my life? What is it that makes anyone fall in love with his or her life?

There are some things that have happened to me lately that have not been good. I constantly think about karma—about the way that I have treated people in the past, and I wonder if this is my karma being served to me.

I vowed to make 2009 a good year, no matter what obstacles were thrown at me. I was doing pretty well with this until recently. I’ve been working hard in school. I’ve been working my butt off to make money, and to save it. I’ve been more considerate of those people around me, especially my family. I stood up for what I believed in at my old hospital job and I can’t even begin to tell you how incredibly liberating that was. I finally was at a place where I said, “Okay, this isn’t where I thought I’d be at 23, but that’s okay. I’m happy, I’m doing things right, and I’m surrounded by friends and family that love me.”

The first obstacle of the year was thrown at not just me, but my family as well. We all went through something tough at the beginning of the year, but we got through it, and it brought us together even closer than before.

Now, it is June. Half of the year is gone. I have lost a best friend and someone I cared about very much in a way that was harsh. It was not on my end, but his, and sparing details that I don’t really want to go into, the person I thought I knew became someone completely different in less than a month’s time. I don’t deserve the unkind words that were shot at me, however, these words have brought me down to a level mentally that I’m not sure how to climb back up from.

Maybe it is because I am getting older and I deal with things differently than I did before, but I have not retaliated with harsh words or contact. I feel like keeping my dignity in tact is something more important than getting a point across. Uh oh. Is Tabitha growing up…?

So, what do you do when you have made plans with your life that include someone else, and then that someone else fades away on you? What kind of fresh perspective do you develop on your life? How do you transition from routine occurrences—such as abruptly being stopped from talking to someone that you’ve been talking to every day for over a year? Life seems to get more difficult as you get older, doesn’t it?

No one else can dictate your day or your mood, as my mother told me. You are in control of that. But sometimes, it’s tough to smile when you feel crummy inside and it’s tough to look in the mirror when your confidence level has significantly decreased.

Certainly time heals all wounds, doesn’t it? I don’t want to wait for time to smooth it out. This is my summer. I want to be optimistic about my life and about the people and things coming in and out of it. I know there is a reason for everything and I want to know now what the reason for the recent events in my life.

I used to think it was ridiculous when girls would say to me, “I need to meet a guy to get over my ex-boyfriend.” And I still do think this is a ridiculous concept in general, however, I now sort of see where this comes from. It would certainly do a lot for your endorphin levels and self-esteem to hear a male say, “Hey, you’re pretty cool and fun to hang out with.”

One interesting thing is that because of the recent events in my life, I suddenly feel like going out and doing and experiencing things I never have before. Things that scare me, things I’ve always been too chicken to do…

Anyway, I’m in the process of trying to figure out how to fall in love with my life. Stay tuned.

UGH!

I don't know if this is going to be a very happy/funny blog as usual...

Here are some things I'm really sick of at the moment:

*Discover Card calling every phone at the Freeman residence, even though I have been paying them what they demand every month.

*Giving 110% in every job I have and not getting compensated for it.

*Cell phone service not going out to Iraq or Afghanistan.

*Stamps going up AGAIN next week.

*Doing what's best for everyone else and not me, yet getting a guilt trip when I actually try to step up and do what's best for me....even a compromise.

*Being stressed about things I have no control over or that don't matter that much.

*Group projects.

*Obama.

*Going to the gym. Why can't i just sit around and get supermodel skinny/tan while watching american idol and eating oreos?

All right, all right. I know. I should be in a more optimistic state of mind. I did just quit the worst job in the world and that really took a load off. And warm weather is finally getting here. And I'm not wasting so much money in gas...Why am I such a debbie downer?

Maybe it's because I don't even get to watch American Idol tonight because I am at work:( Boo.

I Hate Group Work

Soooo....

I have two work days left until I am FINALLY done with the hospital. Woop woop!! Tomorrow and next wednesday will be my last days. *Sniffle*...oh you know I am just sooooooo sad!

Luckily, I have been given five 8 hour shifts at the Hampton and am also doing some awesome work for this amazing company called ValDevTec. Haven't heard of it? Go online at veldevtec.com. It's pretty cool and I work for a pretty phenomenal boss lady, too :)

The only problem with the new hours at the Hampton -- not that I am not grateful, because I am -- is that three of those shifts are night audits (11pm-7am) Friday through Sunday. This shoots down any social life I might try to have and also, Mom is not too keen on it. Rightfully so. I am taking two Maymester classes from 8am-2pm Mon-Fri so it's gonna be really hard to drag through those night shifts. PLUS, I have an internship at the High Museum of Art on Saturday afternoons, so what am I supposed to do about that?

I have this problem about doing what's best for everyone else and not myself and I don't know how much longer I can do this. My boss at the Hampton is one of my best buds, so bringing this up to him that I need to do what's better for me and not him is going to be tough. A part of me just wants to wait it out through the summer and see how I handle it all....Stress. When you get rid of one stress, another replaces it, seems like.

Speaking of stress, I hate group projects. Yeah, I'm an alpha-female and I'd rather just do everything in a group project because at least I know I get it done right.

But no, I try to play with the team like I'm supposed to in my Eastern Religions class and what happens?

I'm working with a bunch of 19-yr-old don't know or care what they wanna do with their lives, so they'll wait until a day before the project is due to start working on it. I'm sorry, I work 60 hours a week and try to manage this school thing -- I can't afford to procrastinate.

Here was the initial plan -- There are 5 of us. We have to research a religion, write a paper on it, and present some kind of visual to the class. Not a big deal, easy to get done, right?

Oh of course not. I'm Tabitha Freeman. God has a sense of humor.

So my part is to research the biggest part of the project -- the history and dogmas of this religion. Cool. The others do the same and one guy volunteers to compile all of our research stuff together into the paper. I keep my mouth shut, even though in the back of my mind, I hear a voice screaming, "NO TABITHA! YOU DO THIS! IT WON'T GET DONE RIGHT IF YOU DON'T!!!!"

Over a week before the project is due, I send this guy oodles of info. Two days before the project is due, he emails me back and tells me I need to put all this info in a paragraph. Apparently, he is getting everyone to write a paragraph and he's just gonna stick it together for the paper.

UH, HELLO?!! Is this going to flow right, sound right, look right? No. Is he a lazy hash smoker that doesn't feel like writing anything? Yes.

So I fire back at him in an email. I am too old for this crap and pay too much money for this class to make anything less than an A on this project.

I point out to him the cons of doing things this way and offer to just write the whole paper myself. Also, I let him know he's a freakin goober for waiting over a week to ask me to do this and he shouldn't have volunteered to compile stuff in the first place if he wasn't going to do it right. Freakin A.

So he emails me back, says he's doing what he's supposed to do and he will make everything flow right. But if it's too much to ask, he can just write my part for me. Okay, sir, that was your job in the first place, but I am COMPLETELY COMPETENT of writing my own damn stuff! So I send him my stuff. Oh God, he freaks because it is longer than one paragraph. HELLO!!!! It's over the history and doctrines of an ancient religion!!! Did he think that was just gonna be five sentences? Is he retarded? No, really. Retarded?

So he sends us the final copy THIS MORNING when the project is due in TWO HOURS. It sucks and he took out half of what I wrote, so nothing makes sense. If we make less than an A on this, he is going down in a ball of flames.

Did I mention this is the last guy I went on a date with that had mommy issues and likes to talk about the one time he crapped himself?

Should I insert "story of my life" phrase here, or is it just assumed at this point?

The guy that did the powerpoint for this was supposed to send me that. Did he? No. Do I even know if it's done? No.

So, in two hours I have a project to present and I guess we're all just gonna "wing it".

I hate group projects.

On a better note, they keep asking me to pick up all these shifts at the hospital between now and my last day because they don't have enough qualified people to cover. Oh darn. I can't. I'm busy picking my freaking nose. Good luck.

Ah, that does feel good I gotta say.

Dunzo

I quit the hospital.
Well, no point in beating around the bush. I put in my two weeks notice yesterday. In a nutshell, I stood up for what I believed in, what was right, and was reprimanded for doing so in front of my other co-workers.
I am so relieved. I feel like it was the right thing to do and I've never been more excited for the next two weeks to FLY by. I could've burned bridges. I probably should have. But I chose not to, which I also feel was the right decision.
My boss at the hotel is super excited to give me more hours....I am hoping I can pick up five 8 hour shifts. I know it's full time, but when you're used to working 12-14 hr shifts, 8 hours is a blessing. Plus, it's an environment where I can do my homework, so it won't interfere with school too much.
Plus, it will be nice not to have to get up at 4:30 a.m. anymore. :)
Wow, I can't even put into words how incredibly liberated I feel.

Let's Venture Into LOW CALORIE Hell Now.

So...
After five days in low carb hell, I decided maybe it wasn't the best idea. Sure, after 3 days, I'd lost 5 pounds (of water weight), however I was completely depleted of energy, couldn't go to the bathroom because I wasn't getting any fiber either, and basically the big deal breaker was the mac and cheese and chocolate cake mom made last night.
So now, 5 pounds down, I'll just be sticking to low-carb. Mom and I are going to the gym, which makes me feel better that in 30 or so days, I might just be slammin in a bikini for panama city....let's hope.
Oh sure, right now after doing some weight training excercises at the gym, I can't feel my entire upper half, but I'm sure that will pass....let's hope. I had to pop a pain pill just so my muscles would quit sobbing from pain.

Also, I can't make myself like water. I just can't do it. I thought I could if I drank enough....and I've been drinking PLENTY. But I can't. It just sucks. It's tasteless and boring and just yuck.

But I'll suck it up.

Yellow bikini, yellow bikini, yellow bikini.......

Down 5 pounds, 15 to go.

(I thought I'd give myself a few extra pounds to lose just so when I start eating again, it gives me a little weight gaining room, yeah?)

Low Carb Hell

So, I would like to invite you all on my journey through starvation.
A.K.A. Low Carb Dieting.

This is my second day on this diet, and though for the first couple weeks of doing this, you're allowed around 30 carbs, I'm trying to be extreme and completely go cold turkey.
To say the least, it's hard. You know why you lose so much weight on these low carb diets?
You have like 5 choices of things to eat. No, I'm not being dramatic. EVERYTHING has carbs in it.
Now, I totally plan on incorporating good carbs into my diet again in a couple weeks, once I've dropped some pounds and gotten used to this whole cleansing my body of bad stuff....however, it's only the second day, and I feel like an Ethiopian kid.

What can you eat on this diet? Well, breakfast is easy, eggs and some kind of meat. But let's talk about the rest of the day. Steak? Ham? Turkey, maybe? Some roast beef? A salad?

Oh sure, you can go through the McDonald's drive thru looking like an idiot by ordering a Double cheeseburger without the bun. No thanks. I've always made fun of ppl like this, and I WILL not do it.

Pretty much, it's impossible to take in ZERO carbs in a 24-hour period. It just can't be done and a person actually be able to eat. You can't even eat a friggin banana because it's got like 27 carbs!

Breathe. This is my second day. I'm drinking just coffee and water.

Oh, I forgot to mention that I won't cut beer or liquor out of the equation. Just ain't happenin'.

I am going to have to break down and have a diet coke today. A BIG one. It's just one....Ha, that's like a crack addict saying, "just one line! Just ONE!"

I got to lose 15 pounds. That's what this health website is telling me is healthy for my height. Plus, I got a bathing suit picked out for the summer for the KEYS (yeah, that's right. I'm going to the KEYS! I love you, mama!) and I have a wedding to attend in May, in which my friend getting married said, "Tab, I want you to still be single. My fiance has a ton of single guy friends who want to meet you."

And I really just want my ass to stop trying to eat all my pants.

Stay tuned. I'm weighing tomorrow, we'll see how much water I flushed out with this starvation, ahem, I mean "low carb health diet".

Keep my thyroid in your prayers.

Just a post.

So, it’s been a little while since I’ve blogged. There’s been some rough changes going on amongst my household, so I haven’t really been in the state of mind to write. But here’s some funnies that have been going on. . .
I got in trouble at work yesterday…you’re gonna love this. I have this really amazing picture of the Rock on the background of my computer. It’s amazing, he’s not wearing a shirt, but he’s got pants on.
Apparently, this is inappropriate for the work environment, even though at the hospital, we see about 50 naked people that DO NOT look like the Rock daily.
So, one of the nurses complains, flips out, says that she’s gonna email a major complaint to all my bosses, yada, yada, yada. It hasn’t happened yet, but stay tuned….I might get written up for having good taste.
No awkward dates lately…I know, I know, you’re falling over in your seat, can’t believe it, right? Even the decent guy I mentioned in my previous blog hasn’t really been in my focus. It’s just not a good time.
I went to the High Museum of Art in Atlanta this past weekend for my orientation for my internship/volunteer gig. I’m so excited. I absolutely fell in love with the environment. I will be an exhibition assistant, working one to two times a month. I’m also really proud of myself because I never saw myself driving in Atlanta, and let me tell you, I cruised Peachtree street like I lived there! I love it down there, too. Such a nice area…probably why there were signs everywhere advertising condos and apartments starting at….get ready for it…4.5 million. OMG! So basically, it’s a dream to live in Peachtree.
Also, I got a random phone call last week from some Indian guy that told me I was being sued and had a court date in California the next morning. He was expecting me to be scared and stupid, I think (it was a scam phone call, obviously), but I was a total smartass. I told him I couldn’t make it to California for that court date in the morning, since I’m, I don’t know, across the country. I also told him he could email me all these avadavat papers if he wanted to so I could look over them for this “lawsuit”. He eventually became uncomfortable and had to get off the phone. Really? Why is it me that gets the psychos?
Anyways, that’s it for the moment. I’m boring, I know. Hopefully some entertaining things will pick up soon. Or, maybe they won’t. I need a break from drama.

Should Honesty Coming From a Male Be Suspect?

All right, time for another blog. I know it'll be hard to beat the outpouring of elation of the last blog post, but I'll try my best to at least make this one an entertaining read.



Gosh, this has been a good week.



I had a great date on Tuesday night, and it was actually kind of by accident. A classmate and I went to a Hindu temple for our religion class. This "classmate" just happened to be the best looking guy in the class that sits behind me. Lucky me. :)



So anyway, we go to this temple and it is beautiful. However, it's being renovated, so there is a little house next door that serves as a temporary worship place. Wow. Let's talk about this.



We have to take off our shoes, and as you all well know, I have a thing about feet anyway. This house has nasty carpet that is supposed to most likely be white, but is actually brown, and then the other part of it has linoleum that has got to be out of the 70's, peeling up at the corners. Yeah, did I mention I was barefoot. And so was the main guy in this place that smelled like an old, poop-filled baby diaper.



Really, I am NOT being melodramatic.



So, that's not even the worst part. I understand that we must respect different cultures and try to see the world as they do, no matter how different. Put ourselves in their shoes, you might say. I totally respect any other person in the world if they respect me, no matter what their choice in faith.

But here is the kicker.

Anytime I would speak or direct a question to this Hindu man, he blatantly ignored me. It was as if I wasn't there. Because I'm a female, I wasn't really seen as important enough to speak to. This pissed me off, big time. I totally respect other cultures, but I am person and so is this guy. I may not be wearing a head dress or a turtleneck to hide all of my skin, but if I speak to him or ask him a question, as a person, he can acknowledge me. I think my classmate might've noticed I was a little irritated at this, because we only stayed in this little house of worship for about ten minutes.

Oh, and as soon as we got outside, I was definitely saying something about the fact that I was pretty glad I was a female living in America and not overseas in India or Asia.

So, I'm writing down directions on how to get back to the freeway to go home when my classmate asks me, "Are you hungry?" Of course I'm always hungry.

So in a surprising turn of events, we end up having dinner and just hanging out for a few hours. It was a really great time. He then asked me to go to the Bodies Exhibit in Atlanta with him, which was so impressive to me. I'm so used to males my age not quite having reached the highest intelligence level yet, or an appreciation for something different beyond dinner and a movie. To spark my interest, something different is exactly what I go for. It was refreshing.
It was also refreshing that he was okay with the fact that I'd been such a spaz at dinner, talking with my hands, and accidentally snagged my earring, flipping it across the restaurant. I know. Charming.

Also, as we're leaving the restaurant hours later, I ask him again how to get back on the freeway.
"Just right there," he says, pointing straight ahead. What? Turns out, he'd driven 15 minutes out of his way so when I left the restaurant, I'd be able to get right on the freeway without making a billion turns and probably getting lost.

He immediately wanted to plan for another hang out time, so a couple days later, we went out to lunch and hung out before class. This was also just as fun. We have a lot in common, he is very very down to earth, and totally accepts the fact that I fall up stairs, generally walk right into the path of danger unintentionally -- i.e. practically falling out of his truck while trying to get out, and am completely in love with my family.

Here's the thing. Though sometimes, it's like looking in a mirror when talking to him about things, there is one big difference between us. As everyone that knows me knows....I am really outgoing and will talk to a wall if no one else is around. He's not really the outgoing bug and could very well be kind of socially awkward. Not that that's a bad thing, because it's not, it's just I never really understand shy people because I have never been introverted in ANY way. Luckily, my little sister and my mom are both socially shy, so I have them around for sound advice:)

Anyways, so my point is, at the end of hanging out, he becomes a little shy it seems, and while I am content with saying "See ya! I had a great time, call me when you wanna do something again!", I feel like something is hanging in the air with him and I almost need to reassure him that I had an awesome awesome awesome time. Plus, I work 50 hours a week, go to school, and am so obsessed about having time with my family when I'm not busy that it's hard for me to plan things right away, as I think he would rather do.

So after our second date, I sent him a text message as an extra reassurance that I had had a really great time.

"I had fun today, thank you!" ~it was something along those lines. So then I get a text message back:
"I like you a lot. I wish I would have told you earlier."

I just look at this for a second.

Here's the thing. Don't think I'm an overanalyzer. But. For a second, I go into this freak out mode. I am so used to dysfunctional guys, you have to understand. If they're not psychotic, they're assholes, and if they're not either of those, they're clingy or creepy or up and down like a roller coaster.

So. Which one is he? That is my immediate thought. I instantly dial the phone to my advice guru -- Mom.

I start rambling off a million miles a minute, telling her about this text message and trying to tell her that this is bad, bad, bad, and what's actually wrong with this guy? Why is he telling me this? He doesn't even know how crazy and unbalanced I am, how can he possibly "like" me already? And what does "like" even mean?

You know what Mom's response is?

She laughs. Hard.

She tells me I'm overanalyzing and being pessimistic and maybe, just maybe, this guy was the first guy I'd met that was actually just being upfront and wanted to let me know, "hey, tab, i like you. Just for your information."

That's it? You mean, this isn't about making it official on facebook or making me change my status on myspace? This isn't about him having some alterior motive to seriously mess up my perfect routine I have going on in my life right now? You mean, Mom, that he is possibly just being straightforward and honest?

Well, I didn't think men were capable of this.

So what do I do, I ask her. Her response is just too simple.

"Do you like him?" she asks me.
"Well, yeah," I answer.
"Tell him, 'I like you, too.', then," she says. That's it? That's all I have to do? I don't have to beat around the bush and say LOL or something stupid like that?

So I do what she says. I say, "I like you, too."
He says: "That makes me happy."

Wow. Why is that so simple? Well if it's gonna be like that, it might fit into my routine, but men are inherently evil, right, so there's gotta be some bad intention lying around here.

However, I haven't really been thinking too much about the possibility of something being wrong with him yet.

Hmmm, I guess we'll just go with the flow and see how/where this goes. So far, my routine is the same and I haven't wasted precious time, money, or gas on this guy and he hasn't really pushed for it. Usually, this is what's expected at least by the second week.

Maybe that invisible "I like assholes and psychos" sign on my forehead is finally starting to peel off.

Stay tuned.

Karma

Well, I've got a funny.
Maybe it's only funny to me.
Karma. Anyone else ever heard of this? What goes around comes around? Well, I'm young, just twenty-three years old, and I hadn't really seen what this means to the full extent just yet.

Until tonight.

There is ONE person in the world that I was absolutely crazy about. Out of all of my insane relationships, I actually was pretty close to falling for this one. He broke my heart into about a million pieces.

Well, I got over it, learned a lot, yada yada yada.

Guess what, friends?

He got a very very young girl pregnant. That's right. His entire loser existence is forever trapped with some jobless, educationless girl who will have his baby.

Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha.

My horoscope was good today. And this furthermore proves that karma does exist. It's like when that really popular girl you went to high school with gets fat. That's how I feel.

I am in school, saving money, meeting wonderful people, and had an amazing date last night.

And the asshole that broke my heart is at the end of his road, the book on his life closing forever to remain the same.

HAHAHAHAHA!

I know, it's a mean reaction, I should be quiet about it. But I am from Ga. And the redneck in me says....

Serves you right, a**.

Ha ha ha . Have fun changing diapers while I'm advancing in my career. Ha ha h ah ah ah aha.

He's finally out of my life forever.

Yay.

Ha ha ha aha ha ha. I think this is an appropriate time for an LOL. :-)

The Bartender. 15K, Baby!

I have a correction to make to my previous blog "A Letter To The Love Of My Life". Well, kind of.

You see, I met a bartender at some point before Christmas of 2008 and he blew up my phone practically. I couldn't remember what he looked like, really, because I'd been a little inebriated to say the least when I'd met him. I didn't actually run into him again, however, until after the New Year had begun. Oh, my. So this is how we start of the new year of 2009 already.



So this guy keeps texting and calling me to come to his place of work and he says he'll get me a free drink. Well, being the alcoholic that I am, I accept finally. Except, I take my mother and my best friend with me. We walk into the restaurant where he works, and while i hide behind a pillar, I ask my mom and my friend to look at him and tell me if it's a go.

My mom is laughing and my friend keeps saying, "Why does he keep walking like a hunchback?"

At this point, it's not too late, he hasn't seen me, we could go to another place to eat. So I beg.

"Please, Mom, can we just go to the Mexican resaurant???"

Oh, she's a cruel woman. Of course not. She wants to enjoy this. So they drag me over to sit down at the bar and I'm thinking, Hey, maybe he won't see me. Maybe he'll leave or get stuck int he back washing dishes.

No no no of course not. Not my luck.

He immediately sees me and makes a beeline. He ignores my friend and my mother and asks me what free drink I would like.

Eh. My mom wasn't too impressed by this. We had to flag him down practically to get him to acknowledge my mother and friend's orders.

I got a new kind of alcoholic beverage that I was excited to try, except this guy turns out to be an awful bartender and messes it up. Well, there's another ten points lost for being bad at mixing treats.

Why did he lose the first ten points, you might ask? Oh, because he was unnattractive and walked like Quasi Moto.

He comes over and starts trying to talk to me.

First, he opens his conversation with, "So you're not crying." Because apparently I'd been so drunk the first time I'd met him that I'd become teary eyed. Which, in my defense, is the first time that's ever happened in my life, and I have no idea what it was about. A Hallmark commercial had probably come on the bar t.v.
WHO SAYS THAT? Is that a good opening line to impress the girl you're trying to impress? Genius gentleman.
Then, he follows up this incredibly intelligent statement with, "So, I hear you have two jobs. So do I." Well, I honestly am impressed for a second. I can totally respect anyone that works really hard for what they want or have. So I inquire about this second job, interested.
"I gamble online. Yeah, I made 15K this year." Yes, he did say "15K".
Luckily, my mother and friend have both looked away at this point so that I can keep a straight face. Let me tell you about my REAL second job, you putz!!!

So after about fifteen minutes of recovering from learning all about this guy's incredibly ambitious lifetime goals, he comes up to me and says he has to leave because business is slow that night and that he has something cool in his car he wants to show me. I say, in the nicest way possible, that I'm not going out at 10 pm to his car with him. First of all, I wouldn't leave the people I came with, and secondly, I guess he didn't realize that I watch cold case and crime library religiously. THERE IS NO WAY I AM GOING TO HIS CAR WITH HIM.
But he just keeps pushing for me to do it. Finally, my mom puts her hand on my shoulder and says to him, "She's not going anywhere with you." (in that 'mom' voice. You know what I'm talking about.)
This probably puts the fear into him, so I say, "Hey, if it's really that cool, just bring it in here."
He just smiles and says okay and leaves.

He never comes back. He never calls. Never texts. He is gone from the face of the Earth as we know it into the online gambling matrix.

No, but seriously, getting rid of that putz was so easy for me, thanks to my mom. I am now taking her along on every date.

Ah, it's not even past the first month into 2009, and it's already started off with a BANG. Looks like there's a possibility I'm still a Magneto of Crazy Dating.